The Phase

Middle school really is a built-in hell period for all people. Kids are trying desperately to figure out who they are, so they tend to react by morphing into miniature people-capsules of hate and ire. In the end I don’t blame them. Their bodies start randomly sprouting new body parts, the dreaded hormonees reek havoc, and they start to go a bit crazy.

And on top of all of that if you are not being your own worst enemy, Sally Jo decides that your pink pen is no longer “in.” And if you don’t pick up the purple like Jenny Sue just did, you will certainly lose all prospects of social elevation in the grand land of high school.

Middle School really is that horrible.

BUT middle school is also entirely hilarious after (IF) you survive. My three years of scheduled torture were no different. For in middle school I went through what adults would call a “phase.”

I decided that I only wanted to make friends with male-people and thought all female-people were evil and horrible and nasty. Though not entirely off the mark about middle school female-people, I took this “phase” to the nth. (I really don’t half-way do anything.)

I decided that wearing anything from the girls’ section of any store that decided to sell me clothing was giving in; and I found that male-people clothing have something amazing.

I could fit so much in these pockets! I began to put anything and everything within the pockets, to the point that my pants were sagging at the weight. I also decided that brushing my hair was not necessary.

It wasn’t “cool” to brush my hair. Why was it so long anyway?? I actually remember one day when I walked into my parental units’ room and declared that I was going to shave my head because hair was so stupid. The only reason why I kept my hair was because my mother so lovingly pointed out that I have a large dent in my head and would look beyond stupid without hair. (She’s pretty awesome like that.)

Along with voluntarily setting myself aside as a semi-hippy-freak-child in an already tumultuous land of middle school slander, I began to surface as what people would call a “nerd.” I again took this to the nth by joining Geography Bowl, the Chess Team, and Math Counts. I was socially doomed, and I was unknowingly plowing right into the pain.

So here I was… a naturally-occuring-white-person-dreds poster child, no female-clothing in sight, and the nerd of nerds.

I was never so excited to see 3 years go by. Really… why do we still put all those hormone-ridden, mean-spirited, middle school children in the same building? It makes them go crazy!

If you were wondering… the “phase” ended the summer before high school. I bought a pair of girl jeans, cut my hair, and discovered the land of make up. (High school had its own phases, but that’s another story.)



Filed under The Past

3 responses to “The Phase

  1. theladyinredink


    HAha…This is so incredibly accurate. Glad you grew out of your phase!

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